How well the relationship is between a stepparent and the stepchildren will depend upon everyone involved. The relationship between the stepparent and stepchildren will take time to develop. You can neither force nor rush the relationship. It will have to develop on its own. At times it will seem to go forward five steps, but at other times it will seem to go back ten. During these times you have to be prepared for numerous tests of patience and inner strength.

You may hear the words that most stepparents have heard at one time or possibly numerous times "You are not my father. I don?™t need to listen to you!!" Be ready to be left out of conversations, be the "Invisible Man" (ignored), be left out of events with your stepchildren and shots taken at you just to see how you will react.

However, through all of this time there must be an ongoing mutual respect between stepparent and stepchildren. The other spouse must support the mutual respect. Through all of this the parent must be ready to do their part as a mature adult, as emotion riddled as the times may get. At all times, you will need to pay attention to the needs of the children. Again, without over-indulging the children.

It is not an easy task to build a relationship with anyone, but when you try to do it with children who may be apathetic in the best of cases or totally antagonistic on the other hand....it is truly a tough scenario.

So is it all negatives? Not necessarily. It can be heaven or hell depending upon how you deal with the issues of a step family. It takes work and sacrifice to have a happy stepfamily. But the rewards can be outstanding. I know...I am receiving those rewards now.

Robert Carver is the founder of ParentInfoGuides.com a resource for parents and stepparents.
Please visit http://www.parentinfoguides.com