Look at it this way, if you simply react to your ex-es attacks every time he or she says something about you, who is in control of your life? Your ex is.

However, if, no matter what they say about you or do to you, you refuse to stoop to their level, if you insist on acting in a superior manner, you?”not your ex?”are still in control of your mind and life.

Jesus wasn?™t teaching, in the above passage from Matthew, chapter 5, that we are supposed to be wimps. On the contrary, it takes much more courage and character to answer an attack with an attempt to make peace. It is harder, but it is more rewarding.

The only sure way to win is to get everyone on the same side.

by Bobby Collins © copyright 2000

Bobby Collins is a stepdad first, then a minister, a certified family mediator, and founder of STEP-Carefully! for Stepparents!, the largest faith-based support organization for stepfamilies in the country. His articles have appeared in national publications and he has appeared on national TV and radio programs always teaching stepparents how to have healthier, happier families. His organization can be reached on the Internet at http://www.stepcarefully .com where visitors will find free articles, a free newsletter, and a book store with proven stepfamily resources for sale. Collins is best known for his private family mediation between husbands and wives, ex-spouses, and stepparents and their stepkids. With over a decade of experience, he has helped thousands of stepfamilies survive and succeed. Contact him directly at coach@stepcareful ly.com